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Series: Star Trek XI
Pairing: Kirk/Spock
Rating: PG-13
Words: ~4,800
Summary: He is Starfleet’s youngest captain. But he is untried, and inexperienced. What kind of captain will James Tiberius Kirk become? A story in three parts. Slow-building, will eventually be K/S.
A/N: I have noticed that some people write a "soundtrack" to their fanfictions. I really only have about seven songs that I've listened to the entire time I've been writing this. I'll usually find the one that gets the inspiration flowing, and stick it on repeat. The entire time I write the scene/chapter.
Those songs are:
Untouchable by Taylor Swift
Superstar by Taylor Swift
Jump Then Fall by Taylor Swift
Try Sleeping With A Broken Heart by Alicia Keys
Bleeding Love by Leona Lewis
They Don't Care About Us by Michael Jackson
Stay Beautiful by DIGGY-MO'
Juves by DIGGY-MO'
The first 5 are unrequited love/love from afar. Michael Jackson is for ACTION MOMENTS! And DIGGY-MO' gives me all the happy scenes (mostly Kirk Sulu Chekov times). As you can tell, there is VERY MUCH a theme to what I'm writing. You can also tell that my tastes…vary. XD
Previous Chapter
Part One, Chapter One
Chapter Nine
"Where are you going, this early?" He asks Bones, as the doctor hurries about the camp, gathering medical supplies and stuffing them into a carry-bag.
The doctor grunts, not even bothering to raise his head from his task as he replies, "Tupak and I are going over a technique for bone grafting that we've been refining. He wanted to meet with me early so we'd have plenty of time to experiment properly before it gets too dark to see."
Uhura, Spock, and Kirk are the only Bridge Officers currently at the campfire, eating breakfast quietly together. Kirk is seated across the fire from the couple, facing outward in case anyone comes needing his attention. The two are seated close, but not touching, occupied with their food until Kirk's conversation with Bones interrupts their thoughts.
"Do you know where Hikaru and the others are?" he asks Bones, who shakes his head in frustration.
"Nope." Then he pauses, continues, "I can guess that Sulu is with that crazy Vulcan pilot – the one that had that theory about that one thing or another. They were discussing something mighty deeply last night while you two were off chatting up the crew."
He stomps over to the tent in the corner, sticks his head in, and emerges grumbling to himself, "The whiz kid is still sound asleep, but he should really wake up soon. That little gel that follows you like she's a flower and you're the sun in the sky should be here any minute."
"Surel? I was wondering why I hadn't seen her in a while."
"Yeah, that's the one. Apparently her, Chekov, and several of the other younger people have gotten together and are plotting. Something about 'new blood versus old' and a competition with a group of older Starfleet and Vulcans. An impromptu marathon, I think it was?"
He stops his frantic movement for a minute to scratch the side of his head, "As for the rest of 'em – especially that crazy Scotsman – well, they could be anywhere. There are so many projects that need to get finished and so little time to do it in, with less than a week before we're gone."
Kirk is not surprised. The building, while still the priority, is not the only project currently underway. The crew had come up with myriad little ways to help make the Vulcans' transition easier, and everyone is working at a fever pitch to make sure everything gets finished in time. And if not finished, at least far enough along so that the ship that relieves them will be able to continue the work. There is also a giant exchange of information going on, as people share new ways of doing and thinking about things. Neither side is going to be quite the same when the Enterprise takes off.
"Ahh-ha!" Bones cries, as he finds his last piece of equipment and crams it into the already overflowing satchel, "That should be all that I need, for now anyway. I'll see you three at dinner."
And without bothering to wait for a reply, the distracted doctor is gone. Kirk is left alone with the couple, and an ominous silence ensues. He knows it's not his presence that makes it awkward; he is getting along wonderfully well with both of them. But whenever the two are together, there is tension in the air. It radiates off Uhura in waves, and for some reason Spock is oblivious – or impervious – to its existence. The Vulcan continues eating his breakfast while Uhura keeps shooting glances at him from the corner of her eye.
Kirk doesn't quite know what to do…he's offered Uhura an ear to listen – not that she's accepted – but he can't imagine Spock acknowledging such an offer. It would probably be a grave insult to insinuate that Spock had emotions he'd need to talk about. The uncomfortable situation is rubbing him raw, especially because he seems to be the only one conscious of it. When he asked the other Officers – Bones, Chekov, Scotty, Sulu – they had no idea what he was talking about. When pressed, Bones' response was that since he and Kirk didn't have any experience with functional relationships, they should just let things be and the couple would work it out themselves.
But things are getting worse instead of better, and Kirk doesn't want his friends upset – or, friend. Based on Spock's behavior so far, Kirk can't quite tell if the half-Vulcan would behave any differently if he and Uhura weren't boyfriend and girlfriend. He certainly doesn't act like any other male Kirk has observed in a long term relationship.
He clears his throat uncomfortably, earning him a glare from Uhura and a quiet blink from Spock, "Do you require a liquid substance to clear your airway?"
Shaking his head quickly, he focuses on his food to avoid Uhura's piercing eyes. It's not his fault the air is so thick with tension he feels like he is choking.
Thankfully, Chekov saves him by emerging groggily from his tent, his thin chest bare in the early morning heat. His hair is as bleached as Kirk's, but whereas the Captain's skin has been tanned a deep honey color, Chekov's looks like he's in a perpetual state of burn. Angry red on top, with pasty white shining where the sun doesn't hit it; his shoulders, nose and back are also peeling in big patches. Bones has given up trying to screen the kid from the harsh effects of the sun, and is instead just treating the symptoms. He is fortunate that skin cancer is no longer a concern, and it is just pain and discomfort that Chekov has to deal with.
Not bothering to conceal a yawn, the young man sinks bonelessly into one of the seats around the fire. Without a word, Kirk spoons him a serving of the random mush that is the last of their rations. With so little time to go before everyone is back on the ship, they have stopped ferrying supplies back and forth. Anything left here won't be brought back to the Enterprise, so they need to finish off the remaining provisions.
Chekov takes the bowl with barely a nod of thanks, his eyes trained on the flames before him as he gives off his patented "don't talk to me it's too early in the morning" vibes. Kirk has been trying to emulate them for some time, but they are having about as much effect as the Chekov-pout. And unlike his navigator, his opinion – and ability to talk – is often required in the morning, and he doesn't have the luxury of waking up slowly.
But with Chekov not speaking, it means Kirk doesn't have a distraction from the situation before him. His only option is to get out of here as quickly as he can, and so he begins shoveling his food in his mouth. Three bites – albeit big ones – and he's finished, and placing his bowl in the stack of dirty dishes waiting to be washed.
"Checking on Archie," he mumbles unnecessarily, as he retreats to the safety of his tent. The thin fabric walls do nothing to block out sound, and the silence follows Kirk inside. He kneels on the ground and rolls the puppy onto its back for scritches, visually checking the food and water bowls. After a minute or so, he can hear Spock pick up a thread of conversation, softly talking to Uhura about one of the experiments currently going on aboard the Enterprise. She answers easily enough, but there is a decided lack of warmth in her responses. It makes Kirk even happier that he's inside his tent. He would pity Chekov for being stuck out there with them, but it's obvious that they're ignoring his presence, and the whiz kid certainly isn't conscious enough to catch the undertones of what's happening. He's safe, for now.
After a couple more minutes of petting, even the puppy is losing interest. There's only a limited amount of time he can pretend to be occupied in his tent, and he really does have other duties waiting for him outside.
Just as he's trying to find an excuse for how to pull Spock away from Uhura so they can start their day, he hears another voice join the duo outside. Quiet, but with more assurance then it had when she first met Kirk, the voice rises in greeting and interrupts the couple's muted conversation.
"Hey Surel." Chekov mumbles, and Kirk can hear him yawn, "It's time to go already, yes?"
Kirk chuckles softly to himself at his friend, gives Archie one last pat, and exits his tent into the lightening morning. The three Starfleet Officers are facing away from his tent, so Surel is the first to see him come out. The expression that appears on her face, while not as evident as it would be on a Human, is obvious to anyone who knows the signs. Uhura does, and she whips around to see what has captivated the Vulcan so. When she sees that it is only Kirk, she turns to regard Surel with a deep, considering gaze. Before she is turned completely away, he sees something like anger buried beneath the surface.
A flash of that same emotion flickers through him before burning out – that anger better not be directed at him. Kirk's done nothing to encourage the way Surel feels about him, all he's done for the young girl is be the friend she so desperately needed.
Chekov is waking up more as every second goes by, and at this point he is animated in his discussion with the Vulcan. There is very little trace of the shyness that controlled the girl just weeks ago, and Kirk is proud of his handiwork. If she can converse easily with people her own age, he has accomplished what he set out to do.
"I hear you're putting together a marathon?" he asks as he joins the group at the fire, ignoring the fact that Surel is staring a bit more than strictly necessary. Uhura's eyes jump from Surel, to Kirk, to Spock, and back again, and it is hard for him to determine exactly what is going on in her thoughts. Although she had been talking before, Uhura stops the moment he steps into view, and her posture is getting stiffer and stiffer as time passes.
Strangely enough, her anger does not seem directed at either Surel or Kirk, but at Spock – who is contributing to the two young people's conversation, unaware.
"That is correct, Captain Kirk." Surel answers, nodding her greeting, "The marathon will take place on the day of celebration, prior to the banquet held in your ship's honor."
"And they're letting Chekov run in it? Do they know who he is?" a wry glance in the younger man's direction, as the Russian shifts uncomfortably.
And defends himself; "Zhey were at zhe Academy! It is not my fault zhey forgot! We are not hiding zhe information, just not…helping zhem remember!"
Surel turns to her partner, her head tilted quizzically to the side, "And what information is this, that we are intentionally not bringing to the attention of the others?"
"Oh ho ho!" Kirk grins, squeezing Chekov's lean shoulder, "This is the youngest student to ever win the Starfleet Academy Marathon! You might not know it by looking at him, but he's a born runner!"
The Russian blushes, bright red blooming under the darker burn. Whether from embarrassment, or the compliment, it's hard to tell. Surel's eyebrow rises at a particular angle, and in that moment she looks very much like Spock.
"Is there a specific reason why we are withholding this vital expertise from the rest of the committee on planning?"
Now Chekov shifts uncomfortably from foot to foot, his embarrassment definite.
"I did not zhink it was necessary?" he glances up, but he's not fooling Surel for a moment, "Okay, I didn't want to tell zhem because I wanted to help. And I didn't zhink zhey'd let me, if zhey knew."
Worry lines appear around her eyes, as she shakes her head gently back and forth, "Come, Pavel. This is not proper. We must go speak with the others, and find out what our course of action will be."
He sighs, then nods. "You're right."
Spock has a bemused expression around his eyes, Uhura one of pinched anxiety, as the two young people say their goodbyes and disappear. The Vulcan and Human then move out of sight past a twist in the path between tents, and Kirk finds himself the focus of Spock's regard.
"It is time for us to depart, as well, is it not?"
Kirk groans aloud, as he remembers what they are going to – it's a meeting with the Vulcan High Council, to discuss how the city has progressed. Hopefully, it will go better than last time. No, he's going to make sure it goes better than last time.
"I think it is, Mr. Spock."
The half-Vulcan stands, Uhura a moment behind him. "It's time for me to get to my duties, too." She adds, looking at Spock with a desperate expression in her eyes. He startles – a slight hesitation that would not be significant for anyone else, but it is with the Vulcan.
"Of course," he says, truly looking at her for the first time that morning, "You must have much business to attend to." He leans his head down into her personal space, an intimate gesture, and then he turns away. Her nostrils flare at his closeness, and a forlorn look is apparent at the loss of his nearness. Kirk watches as her fingers reach out, as if to touch Spock's side and bring his attention back to her.
But they lower, defeated, and her head hangs dejectedly. "I'll see you later tonight, then, Spock."
Completely ignorant to the tone of her voice, and apparently the entire occurrence, he says something affirmative and strides in the direction of the meeting place. Kirk stays behind a moment, turned to her –words on the tip of his tongue, but somehow not the right thing to say – and he sighs. Shrugs eloquently, glances at Spock, then back at her.
She has such sadness in her eyes, worry and confusion. A shudder wracks through her, and then she closes everything off. Straightens her stance, throws her head back and forces pride to radiate through every line of her form. Without a word, she turns and strides off in the opposite direction.
Leaving Kirk no choice but to follow after Spock, worry a tight knot in his throat.
(*)
They are making their way through the newly built city; its edifices are strong and proud and clean, rising prominently from the desert sand. It is beautiful, in its austere way. The work crews did a magnificent job, and Kirk is nothing but amazed at their abilities. And he is stunned, anew, that these are his people, his to command and direct. They put everything they had into the construction, pouring all of their hopes and regrets into making something outstanding for the Vulcans to have and call their own.
All of the completed habitations are now occupied, and they are passing a fair amount of Vulcans on their way through the city. The High Council is going over every building, discussing with the Captain and First Officer the details regarding each. Unlike their previous outing together, the High Council is full of nothing but compliments for the crew and their work. They bring up minute details every once in a while, but they are legitimate issues that Kirk is sure to take down for addressing. They seem just as genuinely pleased with the results as Kirk is, giving the Vulcan equivalent of glowing compliments.
Kirk is able to witness a transformation in his First Officer, as well. He had never realized how much more relaxed and open Spock was around the Bridge crew until now. In the presence of the other Vulcans, especially the Elders, Spock is all hard edges and formal language. He is even more proper than the Elders themselves, and Kirk wonders if anxiety may have been the reason Spock was oblivious to what was going on this morning.
No matter how much of a distraction the Vulcan High Council is, the worry wrapped around his heart refuses to leave. Kirk keeps hoping that, somehow, they'll run into Uhura and he can lock the two of them in a room until they work things out. The both of them are his friends, and he can't stand to see them like this. They deserve to be happy, and if they need some intervention to get them back to that state, then he's not afraid to step in –
And that's when he realizes the Science Minister had just asked him a question. From the minor frown lines between his brows, the Minister realized Kirk's lapse as well. Kirk forcibly pulls himself back to the present, focuses again on the Council and the important business they are conducting together.
"I apologize, Minister, can you repeat the question?" Kirk asks, shame spreading a flush of heat across his cheekbones and ears.
A shift in posture that in any other being would have been a harrumph of grave disappointment, "I had inquired as to whether or not the specific plans used on this structure were included in the information given to your relief?"
A hand reaches up and rubs the base of his neck as he stalls for time, and a better way to say this, "I actually have not had the chance to compile a list of the things to be left behind, or what they should bring with them."
He feels Spock stiffen even further behind him, as differing degrees of affronted pass through the eyes of the Council before him.
"But do they not leave in 3.89 days?" the Chairman is the first to respond.
Shifting of his feet beneath him
"Yes. But there's still time. I'd planned on putting it together tonight and sending their part through."
Skeptical brows shoot up around the gathering.
"I see." is all the Chairman says on the matter, and the Vulcans – in accord with one another – continue moving forward. They are back to being prickly, and all the progress he'd made has been dashed to pieces. He curses his inattentiveness, frustrated to no end as he falls into step behind them.
That is, until something inhumanly strong grasps hold of his arm, and drags him into one of the many alleyways. He readies himself for a quick strike to the solar plexus, spinning on his heel to move to safety.
And stops his strike a centimeter from connecting, as he is confronted with the irritated face of Spock. The Vulcan releases him, and crosses his arms over his chest. Looks down at him expectantly.
"What has emotionally compromised you?"
Oh no. Not the question he wants to have to answer, and so Kirk tries to redirect Spock's attention, "Emotionally compromised? Why would you think I'm emotionally compromised? I'm just too tired, I've been working awfully hard these last weeks and –"
"Do not lie to me, Captain." Spock interrupts, and Kirk is assaulted by a wave of despair as he realizes that redirection is not going to work, "Ever since we left camp this morning, you have been distracted. This is not the first evidence I have observed that signifies you are not behaving in a normal manner. There is an 85.2% chance that it is an emotional matter, and I must discern the reason so it can be corrected before irreparable harm is done."
He gulps, taking in a deep breath of air to delay the inevitable.
"You are aware that I am going to discern the reason, whether or not you give it freely. I would advise that you provide me the information I require."
Kirk glances up at Spock through his eyelashes, sees the determination in the Vulcan's eyes. That look definitely means the subject will not be dropped, and any point in hiding the information from the Vulcan will be rendered useless, anyway.
And so, his eyes fixed on the sandy ground beneath them; "It's Nyota, okay?"
The hard lines of Spock's face soften, as surprise fills his eyes. He definitely was not expecting that admission.
"And what about Nyota causes you emotional distress?" Spock lets out slowly, as the softness seeps away, quickly replaced by anger and suspicion.
Kirk holds up his hands defensively, forestalling that train of thought before it goes too far, "No no no! Not like that!" he stopped flirting with Uhura months ago, and certainly doesn't want Spock to get the wrong impression about his feelings for the Communications Officer, "Just as a friend, okay? She's always just a friend!"
Spock reverts to his normal stance, still patiently waiting.
"It's just that things have seemed strained between you two recently, and Nyota was pretty upset this morning. I was trying to get her to talk to me, so I can help, but…she didn't want to."
The Vulcan's brow clearly furrows in the late morning light. "What strain are you referring to? I did not detect any unpleasantness."
It's Kirk's turn to be confused. He can't really believe his friend is that obtuse, but; "You really can't be serious. You didn't notice that she's been radiating 'I'm angry about something' vibes at you for the last couple weeks?"
Worry joins the hints of confusion in Spock's expression, "No. I was not aware of this."
He lets out a big sigh, balling his hand into a fist instead of reaching out to shake his friend.
"Well, she has been. And this morning it looked like she wanted to say something to you but…didn't. I don't know if it's because you two weren't alone, or some other reason, but…." His voice trails off as he runs out of words.
Spock stands still, his mind obviously racing as he processes this new information. He is silent and so Kirk continues, "I was distracted because I was worried about her, and trying to figure out a way to get her alone so I could force her to talk to me. But, now that you know there's something wrong, it'd be best for you to talk to her."
He pauses, looking into Spock's eyes to impart his seriousness, "This is important. And she'd appreciate it if you were the first to bring up the subject."
Things weren't going to fix themselves, it was clear now, and a little push in the right direction wasn't going to do any harm. He wasn't very experienced in this kind of thing; his forte is usually damaging relationships instead of fixing them, but it stands to reason that the opposite of his typical behavior would be correct.
The half-Vulcan appears to come back to himself, then nods his agreement. He turns in the direction down which the Council disappeared; "Thank you, Captain. I will speak to her as soon as I receive an opportunity. But at this juncture I believe it would be pertinent to reunite with the rest of our party and continue the tour."
Kirk takes a long look at his friend, judging. Some of his worry has eased, as something is being done about the problem, but he has simply passed the burden along.
"Sure, Spock. Whenever you're ready."
He looks like he wants to protest – Spock certainly wouldn't admit to needing time to emotionally prepare – but then thinks better of it. Kirk watches as his friend's eyes close, and he breaths deeply for a minute. Sees the transformation take place before his eyes, as the little signs of emotion he's gotten so used to seeing are washed from Spock's expression. When every bit of feeling is cleared away, the dark eyes open again and look into his own. Kirk nods, once, and leads the way back to the tangle of Council members.
It appears that they did not get far, as they are waiting patiently for the two officers at a crossroads. When the two men approach, the Chairman turns to them with authority.
"We are aware that your body cannot tolerate the intense heat of the sun during the middle hours of the day. Because of this, we have made a concession. We will finish the tour at this time, and continue the dissection of the building progress." He looks directly at Kirk now, who squirms under his gaze, "But once the temperature is at a satisfactory degree, we will convene again in the council chambers. At that time, we will go over what the Vulcan people request from Starfleet resupply, and what we wish you to leave behind at your departure."
Not a question, not even really a request. Kirk bristles beneath the gaze, no longer squirming. That is, until a fingertip brushes his elbow in warning. The resentment disappears in a breath, washed away in residual heat.
He nods, once, keeping his head up and pride in his bearing, "That is acceptable. I will have some things I need to reschedule, but your people's requests are a priority."
The Chairman nods as well, his stiffness easing minutely. His demeanor causes Kirk to pause, as he realizes something. The Vulcan High Council was expecting him to protest, perhaps even make a scene. He prickles slightly at their low opinion of Humanity, of him, but lets it go. The tingle radiating up his arm makes it strangely hard to focus on anything else.
"Then it is agreed. The meeting will take place at 1500 hours."
A/N: Not so much a happy chapter. But the THINGS and the HAPPENING are beginning. And yes, I realize that this is chapter nine and things are just starting to begin. I told ya this was slow building!
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And, I'm hoping, after I write the last chapter I can bump it up to a chapter every three days to reduce the drag. But I have to be done, or nearly done, to attempt that. Can't take away my breathing room!!!!
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I love how the Vulcan settlement/restoration is unfolding. It's great to see how the different races are trying to work together, and Surel's such a wonderful character too! The scenes with Archie and the Vulcan children/elders are awesome, and the slow building K/S have me on the edge of my seat. Your portrayal of Kirk is brilliant: his rage/tears at his family's rejection, his sincere and desperate efforts in helping the Vulcans, and his desire to belong and bond with his crew come through so clearly that they take me on an emotional rollercoaster.
I love how K/S is a focus of the story but not to the exclusion of everything else. This is such a well developed story with attention to other characters and plot it's like official novelization #2! I absolutely can't wait to read the rest of this - it's past 4am and I read all 9 chapters at once - your writing is just that good. *2 thumbs up*
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And as you mentioned, the main idea was K/S and how they get together – but I want to make this story so much more. Cause, yeah, let’s face it – there’s no way that pompous ass from the first movie would just be handed a starship and they just send him on his way. As is evident in my summary, what I’m trying to convey with this story is how Kirk, basically, grows up, and BECOMES that awesome captain we all know and love from TOS. That also means no automatic friendships, they must become a crew and learn to trust each other!!! What started as a simple scene between Kirk and Spock in my head has developed into this giant THING that I must get out XDDD. The other thing I’m trying desperately to do is make all the characters as realistic as possible. We all love super!Jim, etc, but I wanted people with consequences and reactions that make sense!
And thank you for liking my OC’s. I’m always very nervous with those, and I’m trying very hard to insert them, but not let them take over what happens. I hope I’ve succeeded so far XDDD
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And yeah, Spock sucks as a boyfriend XD But I like to think that he just hasn't found the person he wants to be a good boyfriend FOR...or something <.<
I really have far too much fun writing Chekov. He's far too adorable for his own good!!
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This is wonderful.
So many details all nicely mashed in and put out for show.
I'm in total adoration of Archie and puppy breath and calming of vulcan children through puppy petting. (I only wish my dog was so well trained.)
I absolutely adore slow building things (with PLOT!!!) so I'm definitely looking forward to future adventures.
:D
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Puppy is my favorite thing so far, too. And I'm so glad to bring him into the STR fanfiction universe (I still haven't come across anyone else who's used him. has anyone else used him?!?)
And yes, plots are important :D (hehehe!!)
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Kyaa i cant wait until the KirkSpock starts! But i love sloe building stories even if they have me biting my nails in anticipation! Lol i love this. Keep going!
Oh and by the way. Tan, sunbleached blond Kirk? Mmmmmm yummyyyyy lol
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And poor Uhura isn't around for the emotional response except the doe-eyed girl. She does not KNOWWW!
And it will be slow, but I promise, I'm making it as wonderful and SNUFFLY and *FLAIL* as I can XDDDDD
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First, I love your attention to detail - you've given a lot of thought as to how things would likely happen, how Jim ended up with the Enterprise, how they would likely be given 'milkruns' - I enjoyed the realism of that, because it rang true to me. Talking of realism, I'm so glad you had Jim actually studying hard - although he's a genius, so are a lot of others - actually pretty much all of his bridge crew, so he'd still need to work extremely hard to reduce his time at the Academy from four to three years.
There are so many lovely moments to this story, like Jim Jim going around telling everyone in his own way, that he's now Captain, Jim watching the aerobatics and then realising it was Sulu, the build up of Surel and Jim becoming friends, and Jim's adoption of Archie. There are so many more I could wax lyrical for quite a while!
I've really enjoyed the relationships you've been building between Jim and his crew - how they haven't actually all magically gelled, but are still slightly awkward and getting to know each other. That's so much more realistic (I love how Sulu and Chekov think the other is completely mad!) and Bones' relationship with Jim is wonderful, almost paternalistic. I loved that he was there for Jim when he needed him, that Jim was able to let go with Bones in a way he'd never been able to do before with anyone.
And, of course, there's the building of the relationship between Jim and Spock. I'm intruiged to see how that goes. I'm so glad Uhura kept her thoughts to herself as a) I think that's very in character and b) if she did spill, and then Spock goes to Jim, that would make their professional relationship almost untenable.
As for your writing, it's crisp, well-paced, detailed, descriptive and the narratives work for me in terms of their voices.
If I may, there is one thing that I've had difficulty with, and it's the space journeys - Vulcan and back in a day. 40 Eridani is about 16 light years from Earth, so it would take 16 years, travelling at the speed of light, to get there. Impulse, which is all the Enterprise has after ejecting the warp core, is only a little below the speed of light, so their journey home, if they're not helped, is going to be rather long. At warp speeds, a day trip to Vulcan would need them to be going at 11680 times the speed of light to get there and back without stopping. Then factoring in the time for Jim and Sulu trying to stop the drilling, watching Vulcan implode, Jim getting stranded on Delta Vega, the fight on the Narada and getting Pike back, heading back to Earth and the final battle with the Narada and you've lost at least half a day if not more. While ships did get faster in the following century, they didn't have those kind of speeds then. I noticed the movie conveniently doesn't actually show how long it took, and I've not read the book to know what it says there. So the same comment goes for the Vulcan colony, only a day's travel from Earth. The idea that a habitable planet, that close to Earth had yet to be colonised by any Federation member seems unlikely. It was at these parts I was having trouble suspending my disbelief.
I hope you don't mind me pointing this out, but you've paid such fantastic attention to detail elsewhere, that this seems to be the one glaring omission. Although I've written a lot about it, to put that one piece of concrit into perspective, it's actually only a very very small part of the whole, which I've thoroughly enjoyed up to this point for all the reasons I made above, and more. I'm really looking forward to the next installment!
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The little moments are the most fun to write -- big shiny space battles are not what intrigue me about this fandom!! I so terribly love that you're enjoying those the most!!!
Most of my reaction to this review was just random squeaks of joy, so those don't translate very well to the written word XDDDDD
But I will address your difficulties. I know it sounds like a terribly short amount of time !!! And I try to fix it a little bit for what happens in later missions (When they actually get back ON the ship!). But lemme explain my reasoning for Vulcan and getting back to Earth. In the movie, they leave it up to your imagination, and I think that was intentional on JJ's part. Because the novelization actually came first, and it is confusing. And actually contradicts itself. So I used the bits that got the most attention to detail in the novel, and even though it made it kindof super-ship, I needed to have it gel with my starting point. So, what I picked up from the novel: It takes all 6 ships SIX MINUTES to get from Earth to Vulcan. Which is why Jim has to run so fast to get from medbay to the Bridge, and then only has *barely* enough time to explain his theory before they already arrive at Vulcan. And they are, quite literally, just 30 seconds behind the other five ships. This is further confused by the conversation Spock has with his father (about his mom, in the transporter room) where he mentions that he spends all night thinking, every night. WHAAA!!! If it only takes SIX MINUTES to fly to Vulcan, it certainly is not going to be an overnight trip on their very abortive trip to the larengian (forgive spelling) sector. AND they mention giving their quarters up to the Vulcan refugees they rescued from the planet. They don't have to sleep anywhere, cause it's not gonna take that long (in preparation, maybe, if the rest of the timeframes are taken in context).
And for getting back to Earth on impulse -- in the novelization, all the events from the drilling on Earth onward TAKE PLACE IN EARTH'S SOLAR SYSTEM. Including the black hole. The author explains away the fact that the Black Hole will FLOAT OUT OF THE SOLAR SYSTEM and conveniently MISS ALL THE PLANETS. This obviously does not make any sense, and they did not do much scientific research prior to writing the novel. But I had to start from there. XD
And SO. This is what I had to work with. Based on what you mentioned, I'll probably go in and FURTHER adjust the space-distance-thingy for the actual space missions. Probably slowly expand it to actual-realistic-times, to make it not quite as drastic a chance.
And I realized that that was a HUGE dissertation. I'm sorry for the giant wall of text XDDDDD But I definitely don't mind you pointing it out (I'm surprised it hasn't been done before)
And I adore the fact that you stayed up til 3 am reading mah story (I've done that so many times and SQUEE)
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